things and stuf

Over the past few months, I’ve been learning a lot about my parents.  Actually, they’ve been opening up to me more.  No overshares (thank GOD), but enough for me to realize: my parents are real people. 

Obviously, I already know that my parents are real people in the literal sense, but recently I’ve been viewing them outside their roles as Dad and Mama - the “indestructible” beings who only spend their time thinking about their children (and whatever else parents do).

I’ll start with my father.  He’s great.  He’s been there for me since my parents divorced and has always tried to make the best life for me.  I am forever (and ever) grateful for everything he’s done.  My dad is also probably the most charismatic person I know and he loves socializing.  Like me, my dad has this ridiculous inability to stay in one job for longer than 2 years (he isn’t fired – he just quits in search of higher pay and more responsibility).  For the past 6 years (at least), he’s been in nearly every government agency with his position.  He’s been to Iraq (not in the military, but with the government) and wants to go back.  Despite the fact that he’s married and has a daughter, he continues to strive for his personal life goals – that don’t always involve my mom mand I.  It’s interesting to watch him work to reach those goals, because I learn more about his motives, his confidence, how he copes with failure/not getting what he wants, and all kinds of other humanizing qualities.  

My stepmom is another interesting person.  She married my dad when I was in 5th grade, and our relationship from that point got off to an extremely rocky start.  Actually, that rocky relationship lasted through most, if not all, of high school.   It was pretty miserable.  It’s much better now. Anyway, about her personally – people love her.  She has a great personality, she’s caring, considerate and really enjoys spending time with friends.  When I think of her in comparison to my father, they obviously have a lot in common – but at the same time, they diverge on a few major things… the biggest (in my opinion) being mobility.  Remember that bit about my dad not being able to sit still?  Well, my stepmom is a settler.  She’s worked in the same job (with promotions, of course) for 25 years.  Before meeting my father, she lived in Roanoke and had a pretty stable life.  Since marrying my father, we’ve moved 3 times (in the past 6 years) and my dad almost constantly talks about moving again (this time, out of Virginia).  Recently, I can easily see how the talk about moving really affects her.   Obviously, she would have to change jobs – something she’s not exactly willing to do.  And have I mentioned her social life?  All her really close friends from Roanoke are slowly losing contact with her.  The relationships are changing (why? I’m not sure…).  These are people I thought would be family friends for the rest of their lives.  Sadly, that’s not the case.  So – my stepmom is kinda alone now.  When I was talking to her a few days ago, I could hear the sadness in her voice – it was heartbreaking.  At that point, I didn’t see her as my stepmom, but as an individual who experiences and has to deal with all the ridiculousness that life throws at you.